Revelations of a Slummy Mummy

We all know The Sun, and its infamous page three, is a staple go-to for those choosing to binge on a news-diet of tits, WAGS and Eastenders gossip. It's greasy beer and kebab stains on the white vest of journalism are shamelessly unapologetic. Most of us don't rely on the overly processed crap The Sun spews out in providing us with a healthy balanced world-view. But this? This is where it gets dangerous. When the most read, and possibly most influential (at least on a mass public level) national newspaper decides it's perfectly acceptable to objectify two strong, smart, capable British leaders on their front page, you know the murk-o-meter has reached a new low. The English Prime Minister, and the leader of the Scottish National Party - women who have undoubtedly had to work harder and continually prove themselves more than their male counterparts- reduced to nothing more than sexual objects emblazoned across the most popular press in the country  (check here ...

1-At some point in your parenting career you will accidentally ingest your child's faecal matter. Usually in the process of determining whether it's mashed dribbly biscuit or shit on your trousers. 2-Your hoo-hah will never be the same again. This, dear friends, is truth. No amount of pelvic floor exercises can make up for the fact you have pushed a watermelon sized object out of a much smaller sized orifice. And probably needed stitching up afterwards. That shit ain't so fun. Of course, if you have a C-sec, this won't apply. In which case, I am very happy for you. Really. Very delighted, in fact, for you and your in-tact vagina. 3-The more you convince yourself you will not be that parent- the one whose kid throws those shit fits-the more likely you are to birth Jodie from the Amityville Horror. Karma's a bitch man. 4-You've not felt pain until you've stepped on a lego brick. You also realise your levels of self c...